How Jealousy can affect your Relationship

I'll start this by quoting some nice words, wrote by someone whom is defining jealousy like this...

"Jealousy can be unhealthy or healthy, depending on motivation. Unhealthy jealousy stems from fear, insecurity and deception. When you feel acting out in jealousy, you need to examine the reason why you feel jealousy. Before you let jealousy creep into your chest stop, think, and discern the source of jealousy. Once you discover why you are jealous you need to deal with the issue. Jealousy is not a bad emotion/feeling."
by Lirio Y. Lomarda

And there i go now talking about what is basically the most common thing in a relationship and how That can ruin your entire relationship pretty fast(depending from case to case). Many people think that Men do act like that most of the times or they usually show off more but in my opinion the ladies are doing the most significant things after which in most cases the relationship just goes poof. And some examples, like what ladies can do when they are extremely jealous.
--- Wants to go out with you anywhere, anytime, no matter what!
(Going out with your buddies for a beer. + GF? = No fun & Awkward.)
--- Should be able to read all your messages off phone/e-mail/post mail!
(What if you and your buddies send each other kinky jokes and stupid but funny jokes about sex or anything related with such. = No Fun & Awkward.)
--- Calling you every 30/20/10/5 minutes to check where are you and what you are doing.
(What if you're in a big meeting at work and she just doesn't stop doing it, over and over again until you answer! = Extremely Annoying & Awkward!.)
--- Should be able to slap you off your shoes anytime, anywhere, no matter what!
(She doesn't care if you are dinning in a restaurant or you two are in a place crowded/full with people or just in front of your buddies, she just can't wait until you do a mistake so she can slap you since she doesn't really care how many people are around nor any, in fact the many they are the better she feels about it! = Extremely Awkward!)
--- You should never look at/nor salute/greet any other Woman while you're with her on the street!
(What if you might meet with one of your female co-workers, you just pass by and pretend you didn't even saw her? without at least saluting/greeting her just because you're with your GF? = Disrespectful & Awkward. If you do salute/greet that Female Co-worker you'll end up answering 234324 questions just to feed her jealous curiosity.)
--- Open agenda at all times for any reason even for the smallest possible things!
(She doesn't care if you wanna go out with the boys, wanna watch your fave football team match or just have some time for yourself. = WTF? O.o)

And all those were just SOME, just a small amount of examples i could think of right ATM. Now ladies why are you shocked/confused when you hear that guys are afraid of marriage? and you don't ask yourself WHY? well that's because most of you ladies don't realise any of that or at least don't see them in the same colors we do and for sure not feel them alike. Of course there are people whom "like" or accept all those examples having their own reasons like not wanting to be alone so they accept anything that can lay their hands on nor they have other options ATM.

In my opinion a Relationship should be based on Trust, of course you might say that you need time to gain that Trust, THEN wait until you get everything straight, don't just wait 1/2/3 weeks/months and then just fly in the Church in a big hurry to marry if you haven't even passed that kinda of test otherwise you're just going to a dead-end or it won't last. Another thing that should be stated when you engage into a relationship is to explain as detailed as possible your "Things", ask to have your personal space & time, otherwise if all these are not known from the start, after that it doesn't even matter anymore, that's why you need that time to talk, explain and learn to accommodate with both of your fave. things to do, before you jump to the next level, or possible the most serious like marriage.

Now a tip for the boys, at the first gimp of jealousy (of any kind) from your girl don't just take everything that comes at you and start excusing yourself like a little girl having troubles with her toys, take your girl and talk about your issues and of course try to fix them before they go any further, if you did so and nothing changes you might wanna find someone else before its too late, of course in the case of an extreme jealous person. Because if you didn't know there are plenty out there just waiting for a good man to come by, just like the girls are saying "all the good ones are taken or just g@y" :) Never forget to show who's wearing the pants and who's wearing the panties in that Relationship :) and by this I'm not talking about your fist, just remember that one word is heavier then a man's fist, in fact you ain't a man if you hit a woman, you're just another Woman or just coward, showing who's right with the fist is plain dumb or just plain stupid and while she may not even hurt (Cuz you hit like a Woman) but you'll end up in Jail, and believe me you don't wanna know what they do to you down there if they know you were sent there because you hit a Woman :) in fact for sure it less painful to take all that BS from your GF and loosing your personal space & life then just going down there!

Well i can say that i know what I'm talking about, because I've been in contact with that kind of ladies and yes sometimes the other person wants to see you being jealous because in her/his opinion that shows some kind recognition of you actually caring about her/him. But in cases of extreme jealousy its for sure nothing about love… i mean yea you’re crazy in love but you know that everyone needs their own private space, no matter you’re involved in a long term relationship or even engaged/married, none of those things matter when it comes to personal space, personal friends either boy/friends or girl/friends as in Just Friends/Buddies, doing so and showing that kinda of Extreme Jealousy its neither healthy nor helpful in a relationship, its merely ruining it piece by piece because one day, one of you will have to choose, and for sure someone will get hurt, either the actual person or his/her Friends and in my opinion that’s some kinda of cruel and selfish thing to do. So in the end i can say that a Lil bit of jealousy is good/enough but too much just ruins everything… and of course in the end, it ruins your Life.

When I'll have more time i will be adding the Men's side of Extreme Jealousy!
Now ending again by quoting the same author, just a stunning fact whom simple gives me the creeps!
"People commit crime or hurt another person because of being Jealous."
by Lirio Y. Lomarda

I hope you like it, if not make sure you comment anything you dislike/disagree with!

4 Responses so far.

  1. ai mare dreptate in ceea c ai scris...cunosc multe fete si am multe prietene kre sunt extrem d geloase si fac mult mai multe lucruri dekt ai enumerat tu in post-ul sincer...I don`t get it!!! am sa inteleg niciodata dc fac toate aceste abia astept sa scrii si despre gelozia extrema a baietilor pt k eu una am intalnit o persoana d genul si nu doresc nimanui sa treak prin c am trecut avut noroc k am stiut sa inchei la timp...oriqm putina gelozie trebuie , t face sa t simti important/a ... dar doar putina ... trebuie sa fie o limita ... o chestie d genul : "dar dc baiatul/fata aia s tot tine dupa tn ... aaa...ii place d tn ... mai bn nu il/o mai bagi in seama k sa nu s ajunga mai departe" si atat ... am dat un exemplu kre mi-a venit acum in minte ... nush dak este destul d relevant dar la asta m-am gandit eu

  2. Claudel says:

    Problema e ca de multe ori nu realizam acele lucruri, sau poate ptr "noi" acele lucruri sunt defapt doar niste detalii... pe care le realizam cu mult timp dupa ce se intampla, si uite asa ranim persoanele dragi poate din pur instict fara sa vrem... cineva zicea ca prea multa dragoste duce la obsesie, acum cine stie daca o fi adevarat sau nu, sau daca are vreo legatura cu subiectul in cauza :)

  3. din pacate ai dreptate, insa daca totul ar fi rational si simplu...

  4. LaLena says:

    Usi de garaj? Si aici vad ca te-ai apucat de SEO?...